I had a bit of a revelation today - just because something is a good deal and I see it and like it and could use it - doesn't mean I need to get it. It MIGHT be someone else's good deal - and if I buy it - I might be stealing the blessing from someone else. :( I certainly don't want to do that - I want to be used to bless others, not steal their blessings.
I had this "God breeze"(thank you FlyLady for the great wording!) while I was getting dressed and pulling out a pair of white sandals. I have two pair that I love and wear often - both flats and very similar, but different enough that I wear them for different occasions. While I was in Boise, I was at Fred Meyer in the shoe section, and they had a pair of BOC white sandals for $12 in my size. It was a great deal and they are crazy comfortable shoes... but I already had two pairs of white flats. I searched for another color that I needed - black or bronze would have been great - but none in my size. I tried on a different size. Not a good fit. So then I agonized - do I get them? It's a great deal and it's "only" $12... and I ended up leaving them there.
Then today as I was getting dressed and pulling out my white sandals, I realized - yes it was a great deal, but it might have been someone else's great deal! If I had bought those sandals that I didn't really need, someone else would have been denied the excitement and blessing of finding their "great deal!"
I was reminded at church this weekend that I applied this knowledge to my "relationship shopping," meaning that just because he's a great guy, a godly man, and maybe has many qualities I'm looking for, it doesn't mean that he is the right fit for me. I was willing to wait for God's perfect fit for me - and I'm incredibly thankful that I did! I couldn't have engineered a more perfect fit if I had tried - and I did! My sweetie is such a perfect fit for me in every way - we often marvel at the wisdom of God bringing us together - our puzzle pieces fit exactly. <3
I will make it a point to be more mindful while I am out shopping to watch for MY great deals... the ones that fit me perfectly. And those great deals that aren't quite right? I'll know that I got to preview someone else's blessing!
Saturday, July 28, 2012
Monday, July 23, 2012
Grief in your dreams....
This morning I had a crazy dream - a friends daughter passed away (she's a child) and I didn't know until I was visiting them a few days later. They were so calm telling me what happened - it was about 2 days later that I was learning about her death, and I knew she had been sick with a fever, but nothing serious I thought. They said she died in her sleep. Her dad knew something was wrong when her fever was so high but she didn't feel hot. Tears welled up in her daddy's eyes as he told me, but there were other children around and he didn't want to influence them with his sadness, so he just told me as though we were talking about the weather. Her mom was similar - almost cold - as thought the grief was over and she had moved on. I kept thinking what a brave front they were putting on, and tried to do the same, only letting the tears in my eyes spill over one time.
Then Grady came into the dream - he came over to make sure all was ok - apparently I had been gone longer than he expected. When he came in, I told him what had happened, and we left... next scene in my dream I was in a bathroom, with all white tile floors and walls, and a cobalt blue toilet seat cover and towels. I slumped behind the door and began to wail in pain for the little girl who was gone. I was sobbing - the choking kinds of sobs that happened when your heart is in so my despair that it physically hurts.
At this point I woke up. No tears in my eyes. My heart rate was elevated, but not pounding. It was only 30 minutes before my alarm would go off, so not crazy early. Just awake - and certainly not going back to sleep.
Of course my first instinct was to pray for the little girl - and I did. And my niece and every other little girl I could think of! The next thing I wanted to do was call the parents and make sure she is ok, but after a small amount of consideration, I realized that would not be a good thing to do. First of all, none of my dreams have come to fruition, so I have no reason to believe that she is anything but fine. Second, what parent wants to have the thought planted in their brains that someone dreamed their daughter was dead?
Instead, I made the coffee, took the trash to the curb (and quickly realized trash day is tomorrow and brought it back!), spent some time in the Word of God, and now I'm writing about this vivid dream of grief. I can't recall a time that I dreamed of grieving before - I know I've been scared and confused and angry, but grief stricken? I can't recall. I know I was shocked to be sobbing hard in my dream but not when I awoke. And the sobbing was in the 3rd person - I was watching like a movie, but the first part of the dream was as though I was filming the movie. Dreams as so very strange to me - that they change people and places and even perspectives so quickly. That you can recall some things but not others. That the emotions that are in your dreams stay with your for a very long time when you wake up.
I'm thankful I have an outlet to share my dreams - as I'm the kind of person who feels the need to articulate the vivid ones - and this one is not a good one to share with people who know the child. Even Grady will stay in the dark about this one.
My questions to you - whoever might be reading this - have you ever grieved in your dreams before? Do you dream in the 1st person, 3rd person, or both? Do you have anything you "do" with your dreams, ie write them down, try to interpret them, etc.? Thanks for your thoughts and your input.
Then Grady came into the dream - he came over to make sure all was ok - apparently I had been gone longer than he expected. When he came in, I told him what had happened, and we left... next scene in my dream I was in a bathroom, with all white tile floors and walls, and a cobalt blue toilet seat cover and towels. I slumped behind the door and began to wail in pain for the little girl who was gone. I was sobbing - the choking kinds of sobs that happened when your heart is in so my despair that it physically hurts.
At this point I woke up. No tears in my eyes. My heart rate was elevated, but not pounding. It was only 30 minutes before my alarm would go off, so not crazy early. Just awake - and certainly not going back to sleep.
Of course my first instinct was to pray for the little girl - and I did. And my niece and every other little girl I could think of! The next thing I wanted to do was call the parents and make sure she is ok, but after a small amount of consideration, I realized that would not be a good thing to do. First of all, none of my dreams have come to fruition, so I have no reason to believe that she is anything but fine. Second, what parent wants to have the thought planted in their brains that someone dreamed their daughter was dead?
Instead, I made the coffee, took the trash to the curb (and quickly realized trash day is tomorrow and brought it back!), spent some time in the Word of God, and now I'm writing about this vivid dream of grief. I can't recall a time that I dreamed of grieving before - I know I've been scared and confused and angry, but grief stricken? I can't recall. I know I was shocked to be sobbing hard in my dream but not when I awoke. And the sobbing was in the 3rd person - I was watching like a movie, but the first part of the dream was as though I was filming the movie. Dreams as so very strange to me - that they change people and places and even perspectives so quickly. That you can recall some things but not others. That the emotions that are in your dreams stay with your for a very long time when you wake up.
I'm thankful I have an outlet to share my dreams - as I'm the kind of person who feels the need to articulate the vivid ones - and this one is not a good one to share with people who know the child. Even Grady will stay in the dark about this one.
My questions to you - whoever might be reading this - have you ever grieved in your dreams before? Do you dream in the 1st person, 3rd person, or both? Do you have anything you "do" with your dreams, ie write them down, try to interpret them, etc.? Thanks for your thoughts and your input.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Friday, June 8, 2012
Pinterest and getting things done!
For those of you who have known me for a while, you may have discovered that I like to plan projects - research, cut out pictures, get pricing for the budget, check out different styles... but rarely do I actually DO the project.
For example, about a year ago, I decided to paint the kitchenette area yellow. So I did all the work - got lots of paint swatches from the local Ace Hardware, asked a ton of questions about paint and painting, and even got two small sample jars (free with a Benjamin Moore coupon!) and a 12x12 Sheetrock piece to paint and set up against the wall to see how it looked in different light during the day. Remember, this was a YEAR ago. The paint samples are still in my laundry room, I have no idea where the 12x12 Sheetrock piece ended up - somewhere in the garage I think, and the brushes I bought for the job are still in their original packaging.
Example 2 - I LOVE cookbooks. I can spend hours looking at the pictures and thinking how fun it would be to make something I see. I bookmark the pages, plan menus and even sometimes shop for the items. But most of the time, when I'm busy looking through the cookbooks for what to cook that night... it gets late... and we end up with something simple like stir-fry or pb&j sandwiches. I have a million recipes I want to try, that I never seem to get done.
My friend Kathy is amazing - she is always trying something new - especially with recipes. She really inspires me... mentally, but apparently not to action. I've been this way as long as I can remember, and really didn't see it changing anytime soon.
Enter PINTEREST. I didn't jump on the bandwagon at first. But after a few months of seeing Facebook posts about it, I went ahead and set up an account. The first thing I did was remove the connection to Facebook (you can opt out of it after you register through it). After that I started looking around. Started following some friends. Starting loving the ideas I was seeing. And something strange happened. I started getting inspired - not just in my mind - but to DO something!
Since I've joined PINTEREST - I've bought and planted more plants. Re-potted more of my existing plants. Created hanging baskets. Bought, hung and filled a flower basket for the fence. And the biggest thing - found a "tipsy flower pot" idea I wanted to recreate in the dead area in front of my bedroom.
This is a much bigger project than it sounds. The tipsy flower pot is a big project in itself - sinking a piece of 8" re-bar two feet into the ground, 5 terracotta pots that need to be weathered, and planting then all with flowers. But that's not the biggest part of the project. This "dead" area in front of the bedroom is a 14x14 "flower bed" that has almost nothing in it. Four Camellia bushes about 3 feet tall against the wall, some monkey grass and a TON of weeds. After getting it weeded, It still needed about 6-8" of soil to fill in where the foundation had been repaired and the soil cleared by never replaced. That seemed expensive (I'd been researching this for about 2-1/2 years and based on everything I found it would take about $150 of dirt to fill in), and I didn't allocate the money to do it. But after searching Pinterest, finding these tipsy pots and so many other great ideas, I began to form a plan for this area. And I started to get excited.
I knew I couldn't do the whole area at once financially. This would have to be done in waves. I measured off an area that I thought we could dump the dirt in to build it up, and I could start there. I knew we could get a bucket of basic dirt for $10... so I asked SG about the possibility of getting it and shoveling it in ourselves. After a quick search online, he found we could get a better product for that area with better drainage for $25... and we agreed to do it.
That afternoon, we went out and weeded and raked the bed. Got it totally clear. The whole thing (which seemed like a waste to me, but it looked better anyway). The next morning he got up early, took the truck and got that bucket full of good dirt. He brought it back and in an hour - we had it out of the truck (GS throwing shovel fulls of dirt) and spread on the ENTIRE area! I was so shocked! We started with that 7x7 area I wanted to use, but there was still so much more dirt! So we kept going. He told me this would be plenty, but I didn't believe it. Every time I ran the calculations for an area, it showed we would need much more than it actually needed! SG was on a roll, and he went back to get a load of mulch, and we put that down too. I moved some of the monkey grass, too. And now it looks BEAUTIFUL! We even had enough mulch to do the rest of the beds.
I have the pots now, and will get them painted this weekend and ready to go when we get back in town. Still need to figure out where I want to put them, which is a big challenge, not knowing what I will actually be able to put in that area in the near future due to finances. And I have a feeling once that re-bar is in the ground, SG is NOT going to want to move it! :)
I'm not sure what it is about Pinterest that has made the difference, but something about it inspires me to ACTION. Which is a HUGE change in my life.... and one I'm really liking! SG, maybe not so much... ;) I will keep posting as changes are made and projects are done!
For example, about a year ago, I decided to paint the kitchenette area yellow. So I did all the work - got lots of paint swatches from the local Ace Hardware, asked a ton of questions about paint and painting, and even got two small sample jars (free with a Benjamin Moore coupon!) and a 12x12 Sheetrock piece to paint and set up against the wall to see how it looked in different light during the day. Remember, this was a YEAR ago. The paint samples are still in my laundry room, I have no idea where the 12x12 Sheetrock piece ended up - somewhere in the garage I think, and the brushes I bought for the job are still in their original packaging.
Example 2 - I LOVE cookbooks. I can spend hours looking at the pictures and thinking how fun it would be to make something I see. I bookmark the pages, plan menus and even sometimes shop for the items. But most of the time, when I'm busy looking through the cookbooks for what to cook that night... it gets late... and we end up with something simple like stir-fry or pb&j sandwiches. I have a million recipes I want to try, that I never seem to get done.
My friend Kathy is amazing - she is always trying something new - especially with recipes. She really inspires me... mentally, but apparently not to action. I've been this way as long as I can remember, and really didn't see it changing anytime soon.
Enter PINTEREST. I didn't jump on the bandwagon at first. But after a few months of seeing Facebook posts about it, I went ahead and set up an account. The first thing I did was remove the connection to Facebook (you can opt out of it after you register through it). After that I started looking around. Started following some friends. Starting loving the ideas I was seeing. And something strange happened. I started getting inspired - not just in my mind - but to DO something!
Since I've joined PINTEREST - I've bought and planted more plants. Re-potted more of my existing plants. Created hanging baskets. Bought, hung and filled a flower basket for the fence. And the biggest thing - found a "tipsy flower pot" idea I wanted to recreate in the dead area in front of my bedroom.
 |
| Before |
This is a much bigger project than it sounds. The tipsy flower pot is a big project in itself - sinking a piece of 8" re-bar two feet into the ground, 5 terracotta pots that need to be weathered, and planting then all with flowers. But that's not the biggest part of the project. This "dead" area in front of the bedroom is a 14x14 "flower bed" that has almost nothing in it. Four Camellia bushes about 3 feet tall against the wall, some monkey grass and a TON of weeds. After getting it weeded, It still needed about 6-8" of soil to fill in where the foundation had been repaired and the soil cleared by never replaced. That seemed expensive (I'd been researching this for about 2-1/2 years and based on everything I found it would take about $150 of dirt to fill in), and I didn't allocate the money to do it. But after searching Pinterest, finding these tipsy pots and so many other great ideas, I began to form a plan for this area. And I started to get excited.
I knew I couldn't do the whole area at once financially. This would have to be done in waves. I measured off an area that I thought we could dump the dirt in to build it up, and I could start there. I knew we could get a bucket of basic dirt for $10... so I asked SG about the possibility of getting it and shoveling it in ourselves. After a quick search online, he found we could get a better product for that area with better drainage for $25... and we agreed to do it.
That afternoon, we went out and weeded and raked the bed. Got it totally clear. The whole thing (which seemed like a waste to me, but it looked better anyway). The next morning he got up early, took the truck and got that bucket full of good dirt. He brought it back and in an hour - we had it out of the truck (GS throwing shovel fulls of dirt) and spread on the ENTIRE area! I was so shocked! We started with that 7x7 area I wanted to use, but there was still so much more dirt! So we kept going. He told me this would be plenty, but I didn't believe it. Every time I ran the calculations for an area, it showed we would need much more than it actually needed! SG was on a roll, and he went back to get a load of mulch, and we put that down too. I moved some of the monkey grass, too. And now it looks BEAUTIFUL! We even had enough mulch to do the rest of the beds.
I have the pots now, and will get them painted this weekend and ready to go when we get back in town. Still need to figure out where I want to put them, which is a big challenge, not knowing what I will actually be able to put in that area in the near future due to finances. And I have a feeling once that re-bar is in the ground, SG is NOT going to want to move it! :)
 |
| After |
Monday, January 2, 2012
2011 in review
Another year is coming to a close, and once again I am reflecting on the overwhelming evidence of God's hand in my life. 2011 has been a year full of change and confusion for those around me, and my heart goes out to all of you who have dealt with unwanted change this year.
We started 2011 with a return trip from Christmas in Alaska. My dad ended up with two broken arms while we were there, which began a new life for him in assisted living facilities. He has progressed fabulously, and is now living mostly assistance free at the Pioneer Home in downtown Anchorage, and seems to be enjoying the routine and camaraderie of living in a community situation. This has left mom with the daunting task of clearing out the house, and figuring out what to do from here. She has probably had to deal with the most change and uncertainty - so many decisions to be made, stay or go, rent or sell, or do nothing. She now has an empty house (she is dog sitting my brother's collie though!) to contend with, and mom is such a social person. My brother has had numerous family issues/changes this year as well, although currently life seems to be a little more consistent at the moment.
We had some fabulous visitors this year! My mom came to visit in April for about two weeks, and we rented a convertible and drove around the state visiting friends of hers that live in Texas! Her friends had a grand time getting to see her again and she did as well! Lots of great memories were made, and it was a nice break from the uncertainty in Alaska! I'm hoping that was the 1st Annual Texas trip and that we can do it every April... still trying to convince her of that though...
Grady's co-worker in Brazil, Sergio, brought his family to Houston for a visit in January and we got to spend a little time with them! Sergio's oldest son Freddie stayed and attended a school here for a few months, and we got to see him a time or two. His youngest son, Gustavo, is planning to stay with us for a few months in 2012 as an exchange student. Details are still being worked out, but we are so excited for that possibility! It was a joy to meet the whole family, and Ivana (Sergio's wife) is an absolute dear! We had some difficulty speaking to each other, but once we started shopping, we discovered our universal language! LOL!
In July, my niece Lisa, came down for an impromptu visit! She flew to Houston all by herself, at 9 years old, for the first time, and did great! It was quite scary for her, but now that she's done it and knows what to expect, I think she will be fine to do it again! We scheduled her flight so we would be on the same plane back to Alaska, since I was headed up there at the end of July anyway! We had a grand time here in Houston, and she made some new friends too! I ended up getting to be with her for a full month between her trip to Houston and mine to Alaska - precious time! She grows so quickly!
Grady's father spent two weeks with us in the spring, and it was a very special time. His health was not good, but we enjoyed visiting with him and doing what we could to help him get stronger. Sadly, he passed away July 26, and we are now grateful for the one on one time we had with him here. He had a beautiful graveside service with Masonic and Military honors in Burnet, Texas, and is buried next to Grady's mom, who passed almost 20 years to the day previous. Grady returned to Alaska with me after the funeral to take some time to regroup. As always, we had a good time in Alaska, and while the pain of losing family will always be there, Grady chooses to focus on the positive times with his dad. We do miss him though.
In December Grady had his 5 year anniversary with Koch Membrane Systems, and he is still enjoying his work. He is great at what he does, and even does some speaking engagements throughout the year! He still gets to travel quite a bit (about 1/2 of the time) and loves to fly!
We have been keeping busy with our business, and are blessed with a great team here in Houston and all over Texas and the whole United States! It is so gratifying to be able to help others achieve the goals they've set! We love the travel we get to do as well - Alaska, Boise, Denver, El Paso, and of course, Dallas and Austin just to name a few!
We try to incorporate some mini vacations into our work travels, and this year we had a grand time in California for a few days before a conference. We went golfing in Palm Springs, drove through the mountains, enjoyed the coast and downtown Los Angeles! It was my first time to the area to explore, and we are looking forward to doing it again sometime soon!
Grady continues to be able to play quite a bit of golf, both for fun and work, and I enjoy getting out there with him sometimes too! Another gal and I started a golf group for ladies who want to hit the ball but don't care about getting better or the rules... we meet twice a month to play a few holes (sometimes 9), then have a snack at the club afterward and visit... it's really a lot of fun and the group is usually anywhere from 6-20 gals. We call it "Outback golf" - no rules, just right! :) Lots of fun!
The holidays were quiet for us this year - by choice. We stayed in Houston (2 years now in our home!), and enjoyed Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years right here in our own backyard with some friends. Of course we missed being with family, but it was also wonderfully calm and peaceful without the added stress of travel or houseguests. Grady got a fancy super-safe turkey fryer for Christmas (thank you mom and dad!) and he's been frying turkeys and chickens for all of our friends! Oh YUM! Love a fried turkey, but I'm ready for some BEEF! LOL! We are excited to get a steamer basket and use the fryer for crawfish and low country boils too! So many great options - Grady is loving it!
As we begin 2012, we are refocusing on relationships, and being purposeful in developing them. If you live close, we will be looking forward to seeing you; and if you don't live close, we look forward to talking to you and catching up on life! We pray that 2012 will be a year of growth and prosperity for you, spiritually, emotionally and financially! We look forward to hearing from you! Happy New Year!
We started 2011 with a return trip from Christmas in Alaska. My dad ended up with two broken arms while we were there, which began a new life for him in assisted living facilities. He has progressed fabulously, and is now living mostly assistance free at the Pioneer Home in downtown Anchorage, and seems to be enjoying the routine and camaraderie of living in a community situation. This has left mom with the daunting task of clearing out the house, and figuring out what to do from here. She has probably had to deal with the most change and uncertainty - so many decisions to be made, stay or go, rent or sell, or do nothing. She now has an empty house (she is dog sitting my brother's collie though!) to contend with, and mom is such a social person. My brother has had numerous family issues/changes this year as well, although currently life seems to be a little more consistent at the moment.
We had some fabulous visitors this year! My mom came to visit in April for about two weeks, and we rented a convertible and drove around the state visiting friends of hers that live in Texas! Her friends had a grand time getting to see her again and she did as well! Lots of great memories were made, and it was a nice break from the uncertainty in Alaska! I'm hoping that was the 1st Annual Texas trip and that we can do it every April... still trying to convince her of that though...
Grady's co-worker in Brazil, Sergio, brought his family to Houston for a visit in January and we got to spend a little time with them! Sergio's oldest son Freddie stayed and attended a school here for a few months, and we got to see him a time or two. His youngest son, Gustavo, is planning to stay with us for a few months in 2012 as an exchange student. Details are still being worked out, but we are so excited for that possibility! It was a joy to meet the whole family, and Ivana (Sergio's wife) is an absolute dear! We had some difficulty speaking to each other, but once we started shopping, we discovered our universal language! LOL!
In July, my niece Lisa, came down for an impromptu visit! She flew to Houston all by herself, at 9 years old, for the first time, and did great! It was quite scary for her, but now that she's done it and knows what to expect, I think she will be fine to do it again! We scheduled her flight so we would be on the same plane back to Alaska, since I was headed up there at the end of July anyway! We had a grand time here in Houston, and she made some new friends too! I ended up getting to be with her for a full month between her trip to Houston and mine to Alaska - precious time! She grows so quickly!
Grady's father spent two weeks with us in the spring, and it was a very special time. His health was not good, but we enjoyed visiting with him and doing what we could to help him get stronger. Sadly, he passed away July 26, and we are now grateful for the one on one time we had with him here. He had a beautiful graveside service with Masonic and Military honors in Burnet, Texas, and is buried next to Grady's mom, who passed almost 20 years to the day previous. Grady returned to Alaska with me after the funeral to take some time to regroup. As always, we had a good time in Alaska, and while the pain of losing family will always be there, Grady chooses to focus on the positive times with his dad. We do miss him though.
In December Grady had his 5 year anniversary with Koch Membrane Systems, and he is still enjoying his work. He is great at what he does, and even does some speaking engagements throughout the year! He still gets to travel quite a bit (about 1/2 of the time) and loves to fly!
We have been keeping busy with our business, and are blessed with a great team here in Houston and all over Texas and the whole United States! It is so gratifying to be able to help others achieve the goals they've set! We love the travel we get to do as well - Alaska, Boise, Denver, El Paso, and of course, Dallas and Austin just to name a few!
We try to incorporate some mini vacations into our work travels, and this year we had a grand time in California for a few days before a conference. We went golfing in Palm Springs, drove through the mountains, enjoyed the coast and downtown Los Angeles! It was my first time to the area to explore, and we are looking forward to doing it again sometime soon!
Grady continues to be able to play quite a bit of golf, both for fun and work, and I enjoy getting out there with him sometimes too! Another gal and I started a golf group for ladies who want to hit the ball but don't care about getting better or the rules... we meet twice a month to play a few holes (sometimes 9), then have a snack at the club afterward and visit... it's really a lot of fun and the group is usually anywhere from 6-20 gals. We call it "Outback golf" - no rules, just right! :) Lots of fun!
The holidays were quiet for us this year - by choice. We stayed in Houston (2 years now in our home!), and enjoyed Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years right here in our own backyard with some friends. Of course we missed being with family, but it was also wonderfully calm and peaceful without the added stress of travel or houseguests. Grady got a fancy super-safe turkey fryer for Christmas (thank you mom and dad!) and he's been frying turkeys and chickens for all of our friends! Oh YUM! Love a fried turkey, but I'm ready for some BEEF! LOL! We are excited to get a steamer basket and use the fryer for crawfish and low country boils too! So many great options - Grady is loving it!
As we begin 2012, we are refocusing on relationships, and being purposeful in developing them. If you live close, we will be looking forward to seeing you; and if you don't live close, we look forward to talking to you and catching up on life! We pray that 2012 will be a year of growth and prosperity for you, spiritually, emotionally and financially! We look forward to hearing from you! Happy New Year!
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